I’m back, after a difficult couple of months. One hellish yet profound film production combined with a ‘Rona lockdown later I finally have some time to write again. Apologies for not keeping up with my word of a post every second day, but until Sydney’s lockdown is lifted I’ll probably be posting a lot more. From now on I’ll not promise a damn thing & just post when I can.
I’ve reached a fork in the road with possible subjects, but right now I feel the pull to head towards ‘Rona so I might as well follow the trail. The production stories can help provide a narrative context later down the track I suppose.
It’s been really nice not having the time to mindlessly scroll through the matrix everyday, but I finished the production just in time for the lockdown protests & so was met with a barrage of highly emotional, partially true insta stories about people attending the protest or people opposing it. With the disappointingly predictable line in the sand positions making themselves manifest in friends uncomfortably close to home.
Admittedly — taking last in the victim olympics — this is the first time since the initial lockdown I’ve really been forced upon with the reality of ‘Rona since the initial lockdown way back when. A lot has changed since then, opinions made, rabbits holes investigated & minds made up. Leaving me as Libra as ever, left sitting on the fence seeing partial glimpses of light in both sides of the frustrating binary, but ultimately confused & unsure of what to believe.
There’s an uncanny short sightedness I keep seeing within the infinite posts. A kind of weird fixation on data points, accounting of a kind to score points for an argument or against another. Without the acknowledgement of the immense, cataclysmic weight of history which pushes us unconsciously towards an unknown destiny. Feeling rushed, I wish we could all just stop for a few weeks. Drop the bayonets & sit down with each other & just talk. But somehow, even though so little seems to be accomplished, the rushing force of time seems to push us all into half baked actions.
So after the initial dive back into the pool, having felt that icy water. I’ve decided to learn as much as I can about the current situation regarding the virus. Trying at all times to keep a keen eye on my bias & just try to cut through to something clear enough to me. Because all I keep seeing is rushed, frantic, anxious people running around with half truths as if they were the gospel attempting to fix it all. Like this world we have is a broken machine, missing a piece we are all convinced we have.
I’m trying my hardest not to post things on social media or elsewhere — outside of the podcast — without thinking it through & attempting to truly understand the big picture. I started today, with twenty five odd tabs on my laptop, a dexi, a vape & a brisket in my newly bought smoker. So far with nothing but a list of questions to answer, & vague ephemeral threads leading into a deep dark abyss, that I want no part of.
So I guess if you’re interested in reading a journey into that abyss, stay tuned?
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